being simple as it should be
more than enough to understand
like my permanent underwears

Friday, October 31, 2008

I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

New Blog

Hi guys I have created a new blog using wordpress. BUT dont worry this is still going to be the main blog. hahah! the other one is gonna be in used rarely. anyway here is the new link.
http://pamelaspasswordprotected.wordpress.com

anyway FYI. it only for ppl with passwords. I think its kinda clear by seeing the URL.

Can you tell me
How can one miss what she's never had
How could I reminisce when there is no past
How could I have memories of being happy with you
Could someone tell me how can this be
How could my mind pull up incidents
Recall dates and times that never happened
How could we celebrate a love that's too late
And how could I really mean the words I'm about to say.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

it been rather busy for me. red camp is approaching. BA's Amazing race is coming too. another dancesports competition is coming too. LOL im LIKE SOOOOOOOOOO DEAD! LOL how to multitask to many things red camp is 19 to 21 NOV. so from NOW UNTIL THEN I PRACTICALLY HAVE TO STAY BACK LATE IN SCHOOL! some more i have make up classes. thanks to the vacation on monday 27-oct. lol all classes have to make up. so i end classes close to 6 everyday. HENG classes today is at 1. LOL but i will be meeting my friend to gt FBT shorts. hmm OHHHHH and ytd dance was at 630. but i told brandon i will be going late cos i had to shoot the mass dance video for red camp. and it drag and drag and drag AND DRAGGGG until like 735. ==" and lessons ends abt 800 or 810. zzzz. imagine how long i went for dance. 10 to 15 mins and POOF. im gone from there already ==" but we cant blame the shooting as well. cos block 56's room is horribily small and cant seem to fit most of us in. ahhaa. and i tore a hole in my dance skirt. lol because my heel caught on to the back of my skirt. LOL i better hurry sew up the hole. ==" but seriously i need a new skirt too. the other day roysten was talking to me over msn. so i asked him how was the stay at the loft. haha cos BA society had a camp called MSA camp. my mom din let me go. so im quite pissed and sad. LOL but then again BAMP is coming up. another camp!! yeppie! okay anyway he was talking to me asking me to get involve withe the upcoming events too. i was like. erm i want to but seriously and SERIOUSLY SPEAKING im super packed. 1stly is because of upcoming red camp; 2ndly is bloody make up classes; 3rdly is assignments as well as projects; and I THINK lastly will be the mass dance video shooting and skit practice. ==" i know that i have been skipping BA stuff. im really sorry but im really busy. even the NP green Bazzar thing, i wanted to go. but i have classes to attend. anyway bottom line is tat i want to go. but seems like a lot of thing have clashes. i really do hope ur guys understand.


I wanna be want who you believe
There is a piece of me who leaves when you're gone

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Sometimes it takes a different kind of dream to make you smile.
Sometimes we need another helping hand to show the ways.
Sometimes it seems impossible and that's why we pray
Now I'm all by myself wondering where is love or should i just give up.
Life falls down on me, cuts into my soul
But I know I got the strength to make it through it all
Because I'm still standing tall breaking through this wall
I'm gonna give my all.

Be with me. Help me dance my worries away.
One dance. One last dance would do.
I'm sorry but recently I've been really physically & mentally exhausted.

Please bare with me random-emotional outbreak.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A story that will always and forever be a dream

Heart don't fail me now. Courage don't desert me, don't turn back now that we're here. People always say life is full of choices. No one ever mentions fear or how the road can seem so long;how the world can seem so vast; Courage see me through heart I am trusting you. On this journey to the past.

Hope.

Love.

Family.

Recently I feel super dejected. I have no idea why. Great! Now I'm like super emotional. I have been like that. I have been lying to myself; telling myself that it's okay, he is just someone I'm really close to. Somehow the closer we get, the more I get pulled into the circle of love. I know that he is someone that I can't be together with. Don't ask me why, it's just like this. Can life get any better? I really want to be with you all, supporting you all the way. One way or another I yearn for your touch, your hold. It sounds stupid. I enjoy your presence and company. I don't mind starting a new chapter of my life with you. I want to be there for you. I want to be your everything. But when I saw the way you handle girls is like "WOW", I'm impressed but all I see is green. Green with jealousy but not envy...

In the end of the day, it will all turn out to be dreams.
I'm falling for you but I don't want to.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Share $25

Life is relatively simple. It's the human nature that twist and turns it around making so complex and complicated. Anyway, I shall be a story teller today. A short and sweet story about $25, a son and his father.

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'

DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.

SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'

DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.

SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'

DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'

SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'

The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.'

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:

Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

'Are you asleep, son?'

He asked. 'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.

'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.'

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.

The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.

The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled.

'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.

'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.

It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

alot of things have happent for the past few days and i seriously have no time to update my blog. just saw kenny recently and he was like UPDATE UR BLOG!. then i was like huh?. kinda blur for the moment. ok anyway recently was the SL camp. and i ended camp today. it was suppose to be a 3 day 2 night thing but in the end they changed it to 2 days 1 night. well anyway funny things happen during the camp and stuff. we cheered and we bonded and we made out own tribe identities and banners! we also had our MASS DANCE! the movements were really simple BUT when the song was played, it was hard to catch. haha i find that ytd night was super funny but kind annoying for a while. all our tribe member met at our room 02-01. its called the tribe room. haha so a few of us din have to move. we practice our cheers up until 2 close 3 am in the morning. all of us were to exhausted! but we couldnt sleep. cos some of us ordered mac. deb and i went to the guys room cos the food somehow ended up there. so we stayed there for food! while chilling and relaxing there for a while. Xue Zhi, Gerald, Deb and i ended up being super high! ahaha. Deb and her NRA, me and my pillow. ==" yea apparently Jon Chia managed to sleep outside with us making so much noise. oh Brandon went to bed too. haha cos he was to tired already. soon after which adam and khai dan came in, they just disappeared to one of the rooms. after a while adam came out, asking us is sarah nat here. we were like.. erm.. nope. i told deb after 5 mins we go back to our rooms. and at exactly 3 mins later, adam say im going down to find sarah nat. i looked and deb. hahah and we know what is going on in our minds. anyway bottom like is Both Deb and I crash the guys room. =="